"digestion"

i close my eyes and shut my nose
to help simplify your existence
and what it does to my chest.
what it does to my checks.
what it does to my nerves.
i smile fondly and carve nothingness into my mind.
sweet isolation mends my open heart. filling in the cavern with numb difficulties.
i remember the first time i met you
time stopped and you grinned sideways, partially winking at him.
in your green shirt, you tucked your hair behind your ear and my heart stopped.
from the moment i first saw you, i knew.
you would be prone to constant mental editing.
the way she opens her heart.
i want to protect her.
balancing the both of you, leaves my chest rotten.
leaves my breast devoid of feeling.
leaves my trust locked behind my retinas.
leaves me genderless and cynical.
i want to stroke your cheeks.
i bite my tongue, looking thru not at you..
always in my mind.
is the way you look at me.
do they see it that way too?



/close./